Thursday, July 1, 2010

I want to be a Superhero when I grow up.

Or not.

Saving the day is one thing.  But there are some whom I would have a difficult time defending ...

Went to a local coffee shop the other day.  Sat back sipping java and ... listening.  Watching the people come and go.  An old acquaintance came in and sat down across from me and started expressing his thankfulness that his children were grown and his "ol' lady" had relocated with another man ... "The filthy slut," he said smiling, but his eyes were cold.  Anyway, his verbal meanderings soon adopted an even more venomous tone ... truly.  

As my gaze passed from his ruddy face to the gathering of other java-junkies and back again he continued to chatter on and the iciness of his voice caused me to shudder ... Wishing ill on others is one thing ... but his resentment and vindictiveness were off the charts.  I cannot imaging carrying such weight ... I don't believe I would survive ... to be filled with so much anger and hate, to me, would be a terminal condition.  I didn't recall him being so ... Negative ... before, sure he was disgruntled now and then, but nothing like this.  And then he shifted his focus to immigration. How he made the leap still escapes me, but nearly instantaneously he was venting his discontent over the immigration situation.  I'm not going into detail, but suffice to say he was passionate about his stance ... Just being in his presence for a brief time was enough to jolt me ... and has haunted me since ... I cannot figure out how or why he would be so willing and OPEN as to spout such horrible things ... and then to walk away Smiling!!!

How is it that people adopt such steadfast judgmental attitudes ... can be so unforgiving ... may actually Pray for the demise of others ... or otherwise wish them ill ... and never give the first thought to the implications of his (or her) actions???  How may one be so selfish as to truly not care about the welfare of his (or her) fellow travelers ... ??? I may be completely leaving myself open to all sorts of judgments and assumptions by even posting such questions ... and may seem incredibly naive ... but I am truly intrigued b/c no one has ever been able to offer an answer ... 

I have a dear friend who not too long ago diagnosed me as having a Social Conscience ... the basis for much of my concern and intense feelings ... I readily accept this explanation, in part (for he too has the condition) ... But, on the flip side, how may one be filled with such hostility, as the gentleman in the coffee shop, that they literally ooze negativity to the point that others feel drained just by being in their presence for only a few minutes???  I cannot fathom having such disregard for others ... Alas, it would seem I am wandering amongst the dark woods alone ... seeking elusive answers.  Maybe ignorance is bliss ... sometimes.

1 comment: